I managed to find a partner for life.

21st October 2022 //

Pratakkh! I have been facilitating a support group with this name for over a year now. In February this year, an existing member further happened to invite a relative of him to join our group. Well, I ended up exchanging engagement rings with this “relative” in front of about 40 people almost two weeks ago. And I now happily refer to him as my fiancé. The real kind.

It may have been a little too quick. It kind of is, even in my thoughts sometimes. It essentially spiralled down to trusting the energies, I think. Precisely, in fact! During these last months of knowing him before we made it official, there were so many times where I could feel myself literally flowing like a river. Just embracing the developments without much contemplation. I could feel new emotions plainly as they were, without any layers of logic or rationality or mindfulness.

I timely figured that for me, falling in love with people and making them feel loved is rather easier. But with him, it felt okay to let this person offer words of respect and love and appreciation beyond the generally accepted levels of friendship. And bingo! Before I could realise, the concentration of love and care on both sides started to balance pretty well.

However, the level two truth that I was warned about by friends and what I was looking forward to is important and is fairly uncomplicated. It is that all relationships, always, everywhere, will have certain moments where one or both feel(s) pinched. Period! Currently, I am mentally trying to accept this truth; to allow the imperfections find as big a place in my heart as the times when he says or does the most appropriate things or stories from romantic movies or what we see famous couples doing on Instagram.

In all honesty, I still find myself surrounded by thoughts of “does any of it even make sense?” and similar stuff. And I wish to not bury any of this but validate these as means of adding value to my relationship…. with him and with myself.

Nihal